How I Often Spend Fridays
Friday is the Moslem Holy Day in Jordan, and as such, it is the day chosen for weddings, planned social occasions, family outings etc. This is true for Christian Jordanians as well, since EVERYONE is free on Fridays.
The past three Fridays were taken up with family happenings for me. Two weeks ago on Friday my grandsons received their first communions. They were in a class of about 180 children, so only 92 were scheduled that day - the other half for the following Friday! Grandparents, aunts and uncles, not to mention each child’s god parent and nuclear family were there. It was a photo opportunity surpassing all others and a joyful, memorable event.
The next Friday my husband had to go to Madaba, his home town, to ask for a bride for his nephew. Nowadays this tulbeh, as it is called, is nothing more than a formality since most couples have their families’ permission already. The tulbeh is an old tribal custom and not limited to Christians, and this is how it works. Generally six to eight men from the groom’s family go to the bride’s house where they will be greeted by the bride’s father and an equal number of men from his family. In my husband’s tribe, the groom doesn’t even go and no women are present. The eldest uncle of the groom formally asks the father of the girl for her hand. As soon as the father agrees, coffee is served to seal the agreement, and that’s that. As outmoded as this custom may seem today, most of the young people I know, my children included, anticipate having a formal tulbeh as a delightful way to dignify and validate their engagements.
Yesterday was Friday, and we went to church again. This time it was to attend a six month memorial mass for three family members. It wasn’t an accurate six month accounting for two of the deceased, but the plan was to combine the dates and make one memorial mass in the hope that the next two Fridays will remain free - Inshallah. ASH
The past three Fridays were taken up with family happenings for me. Two weeks ago on Friday my grandsons received their first communions. They were in a class of about 180 children, so only 92 were scheduled that day - the other half for the following Friday! Grandparents, aunts and uncles, not to mention each child’s god parent and nuclear family were there. It was a photo opportunity surpassing all others and a joyful, memorable event.
The next Friday my husband had to go to Madaba, his home town, to ask for a bride for his nephew. Nowadays this tulbeh, as it is called, is nothing more than a formality since most couples have their families’ permission already. The tulbeh is an old tribal custom and not limited to Christians, and this is how it works. Generally six to eight men from the groom’s family go to the bride’s house where they will be greeted by the bride’s father and an equal number of men from his family. In my husband’s tribe, the groom doesn’t even go and no women are present. The eldest uncle of the groom formally asks the father of the girl for her hand. As soon as the father agrees, coffee is served to seal the agreement, and that’s that. As outmoded as this custom may seem today, most of the young people I know, my children included, anticipate having a formal tulbeh as a delightful way to dignify and validate their engagements.
Yesterday was Friday, and we went to church again. This time it was to attend a six month memorial mass for three family members. It wasn’t an accurate six month accounting for two of the deceased, but the plan was to combine the dates and make one memorial mass in the hope that the next two Fridays will remain free - Inshallah. ASH
posted by joladies at Saturday, May 13, 2006
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